I Met A Man

Hahaha…that’s right. This is a lady’s story. Hear what she has to say. This man ticked all the boxes. A good listener, caring, thoughtful and “God fearing”. Let’s call him John.

John would call first thing in the morning and last before going to bed. He initially talked about his past which according to his tales was packed to the brim with sad and horrid stories. I didn’t talk about my past at all. To me, it was all in the past now. For the first time I saw a man who didn’t pry. Lol! Little did I know what was coming. Haha..

He was bold and decisive, knew what he wanted. Wow…did such men still exist? John wanted a condusive home of peace and harmony, consisting of wife and children – don’t we all? He also had an aged mother to cater for. So kind hearted, a human being! I was excited for such a monumental fortune “change” in a relationship. That’s the thing. It seemed I actually expected such a human being to exist. Didn’t l? I’ve no idea.

Well, one morning, I got a phone call that shattered to piece my sand castle. It was a distress call, John’s mother had been shot by armed rubbers. She was being wheeled into the hospital as I was informed by the caller. He couldn’t be reached on phone!I was told. I immediately tried to reach him to no avail.

The calls kept coming, I remember wondering why I was the one being called incessantly on a case like this? But there were no time to muse, the doctor informed me, she needed to be in surgery asap. I made a decision l would’ve made if she were to be my mother. I told the doctor to commence surgery and save her life. I was told how much to deposit into the hospital account before surgery could begin. I believed I did well under pressure. After the surgery, John later returned my call. I told him all that happened. He was stunned to say the least. He called me an angel for saving his mom.

I was glad, I could help. That’s all I said. Except, none of it were true. It was all theatrics, “staged”. He was a fraud trying to steal from me. I’ve thought hard through all these- and I keep asking myself, what I’d have done differently or what I’d do if someone ever needed my help again, for real or fake? The trauma alone of vizualizing a mother dying on a hospital gurney because her son couldn’t be reached.

It’s a lesson learned, the hard way. I know now what human being are capable of-all for money. How much was it that you stooped so low…

Hahaha…what’s your thoughts on love scam?

Do have a wonderful evening, you all!

What’s The Solution To Sexism And Harassments Of The Female Gender In Our Society?

Hello ladies and gentlemen…

I’d deviate a bit. My today’s topic is one of those touchy issues nobody wants to acknowledge in our society. It is also a question to both genders. My question is;

What’s The Solution To Sexism And Harassments Of The Female Gender In Our Society?

The appalling stories are getting worse. Ladies get murdered, physically abused, exploited, raped regularly by men at will. Most endure in silence. Since those that ever got the courage to speak up are jeered, mocked openly, even by their kind. These acts being constantly ignored affect relationships, marriages too. A depressed, even suicidal lady- or one being harrassed at work could become erratic, unpredictable or worse due to bottled up emotions. These issues needs to be taken seriously for our society to attain a balance. If these issues pertaining to womanhood isn’t given proper attention. Who knows how many unhinged ladies the society would’ve on its hands in the nearest future?

Who instigates these unbecoming ills taking  our society by storm? Who motivates and encourages the atrocities taking place at  offices? In our society as a whole. Degrading the female folks, ripping off their self worth to shreds. Stripping them of dignity…

What gets to me is how men most times are quick to defend oppressive “norm” in our society, which mostly works in their favour. Sexism at some workplaces is pathetically real. There’s this blatant discrimination against the female gender. She has to work twice as hard as a male colleague to be qualified for a certain post reserved mostly for the male folks at the office. Some are harassed constantly by their superiors. Men sadly don’t speak against these acts, because there seemed to be an unwritten code for the male gender to stick together against an attack on one of their own. Even if he’s obviously guilty.  A lady that decides to report such action, risks a lot including her job. Instead of colleagues coming to her rescue. She becomes a pariah ( an outcast among colleagues at the office.) She may not be outrightly sacked by the powers that be, but could be subjected to an inexplicable dose of humiliation, mockery, untold hardship that she’d die of depression if she didn’t leave the organisation on her own. The unfortunate scenario above,  would be for a lady courageous enough to speak up. To report harassment through the appropriate channels at her place of work against one of the “big guns.”

Now-  why’d anyone else ever report harassment against any superior in such organization/firm? Most wouldn’t dare, not because it isn’t happening but for the fear of repercussions. Suing a superior for harassment in this part of the world? Who’d pay the bills? For how long would the case be dragged on to frustrate the litigant? And which judge would eventually grant you a fair hearing and actually punish the offender to serve as deterrent to others?

I’d say due to the lackadaisical attitude- this sexual harassment issues are being handled across the globe. Young girls/ladies are being assaulted/ abused; sexually harassed; raped- even at higher institutions by some randy lecturers…it escalates to work places. Some with no other options would eventually succumb to the pressure. Yet the society turns a blind eye…

The African society isn’t favorable on the female folks at all. Right from puberty, men old enough to be your father- grope you, exploit you at any given opportunity. You’d become instantly unpopular if you refused to play along. You “dodge all those bullets” growing up. Now work place? Shockingly even fellow ladies would despise you if you failed to succumb to the pressure or refused to shut your damn mouth about it…!

Does resisting this disgusting unfortunate “norm,” change the paradigm? In a society that sees no grey areas? Men are quick to condemn feminism or any scheme that fights for women(human) right. Or spurs women on, imploring  them to use their heads. Be active participants in the society.

It’s time women said no to barbaric practices, voice out and stand up for themselves.  A society where giving you a job you are qualified for would require sexual exploitation from your potential boss? Why must one trade sex for a job she’s suitable for and quite capable of doing well?

Men see all these ills in our societies. They see poor kids being married off at tender ages- even before teenage at times. They see their colleagues/friends harass female employees because they could and get away with it. They see the superiors, harass/ abuse female staff, “married women” included. No one does a damn thing about it.

I implore all men in general to be considerate and sensitive to women’s plight in the society. Some of your past actions created the dangerous creatures some women are becoming lately.  Please be wise…it could be your sibling next.

What’s the way out of these deteriorating issues?