Love Yourself!!!

Hello ladies and gentlemen…

my topic today says; love yourself

I read a very sad story this morning on Facebook of a “young lady” that committed suicide after being jilted. According to the story, she’d been in a relationship with a young man who broke up with her after about 12yrs in a relationship. Painful…sad, I know…  but suicide??? Really? Over someone who didn’t see or “forgot” your value? That’s extreme.

A breakup is always painful if you’re the one jilted. C’mon, get angry, cry if you feel like it! You feel let down, disappointed, unappreciated, taken for granted… It’s normal to feel those things. Don’t  bottle the anger or pain. It’s allowed and a very crucial part of healing. Move on with your life. Someday, someone who sees your value, who understands and appreciate you’ll come by. To commit suicide over a breakup means, you never valued or appreciated yourself. You let someone else be your source of happiness. You simply don’t love yourself enough to be your own source of joy, to hold your life dear. lt’s your life afterall.

Anyone in a relationship should be mature enough to know it’s never a done deal. It could go either way. Therefore, never tie your entire life on another person’s decision or mindset. It could work or not and it’s never a do or die affair. If it works out, oh! Good! If not, dust yourself, move on. That, it didn’t work, might not be because of things you didn’t do a certain way. Maybe, you just weren’t compatible. Someone else who might understand you better or be exactly what you’ve needed all along would come by, when you let go.

Committing suicide over a fellow who waited for 12yrs to make a decision on a relationship? If it didn’t work, it’s simply because one person was dissatisfied all along. You should’ve seen the handwriting on the wall and moved on. I implore us all, let’s use our head when necessary in a relationship and not lose our heart or life over someone that ordinarily didn’t matter.

Do have a lovely day, you all!

Is Desperation The Solution? 

Hello ladies and gentlemen…

Today I’m going to touch one of those sour spots we hate to talk about out there again. My topic today says;

Is Desperation The Solution? 

Let’s quickly find out what this word “desperation” is about. The English dictionary defines desperation as;(1)  “the act of despairing or becoming desperate”;  “a giving up of hope.” (2) ” A state of despair, or utter hopeless; abandonment of hope; extreme recklessness; reckless fury.”

Hmm…the definition of this word alone, makes me shudder. It gives me goose bumps, just the thought of someone living his/her life in such state of mind. Sadly, societal pressure has made desperation almost a norm in our society. Having reckless abandon in the pursuit of our desires have become a norm. Desperation isn’t a gender thing. Anyone could become desperate, depending on one’s fervent desire to accomplish a particular goal. A society where a particular set are viewed as failures; losers; nonentities. These set are constantly looked down upon. The desperation to achieve what garners “respect” to others becomes a norm.

For instance most unmarried ladies these days, will do whatever it takes to tie the knot,  become a “Mrs.” This is because the society has made it appear as  the most prestigious title a woman should have before any other. Unmarried women are mostly lumped in as wayward or indecent for being single still at a certain age. Disheartening….

That’s not all. Men are under pressure too, to acquire wealth. A status that should take years of hardwork to achieve. The youth in their quest to make their mark and be accepted and accorded “respect” in the society, do a lot of despicable things, that at times leads to death, in desperation. A bachelor of certain age is also viewed as irresponsible for daring to remain single. No one is interested in the “why.”

How’s desperation the solution? I’m asking this question because I have noticed people get furious with anyone they perceived as “not desperate”, especially if you are unmarried and yet, doesn’t exhibit any of the known attribute of those in a hopeless situation, such as recklessness; being depressed, miserable etc.

My question this evening is this; Can someone explain to me how being desperate solves our problems? Take a look at our political setting today. Desperation has made politics a do or die affair. Most in our society will do just about anything to win. What comes after the win? Hmm…mm?

The quest to marry at all cost has destroyed our core values. Nobody cares anymore about the seriousness of the venture. The end “now” justifies the frigging means. Lol.

A lot has been damaged in our various societies  due to desperation. This has caused so much pretense in our today’s youth. They comport themselves in a certain manner, just to get what they want instead of being themselves or working on themselves to be better as the case should be.

These are what desperation does; It puts you in a state of despair; you become extremely reckless; no caution whatsoever;not thinking straight; you would swallow any nonsense solution thrown your way. You are thrown wide open for extortion, manipulation, abuse,untimely death even, all in the name of searching for “any” solution to your perceived problems. Caution is thrown to the winds. Some become life casualties… if not now, later in life.

My advice to us all this evening is to fight the feeling of despair in whatever situation we find ourselves in life. It solves nothing in the long run, it only somehow compound the problems.

That’s all I have to say this evening ladies and gentlemen. What’s your view on this? Share it on here, others could learn from it.