Why Do Some Mistake Being A Pushover For Being Humble?

Hello ladies and gentlemen…

I do have an interesting topic today. In fact it’s a question I’d love some genuine answers to, because -this is a topic I’ve been mulling over for a while now.

Why Do Some Mistake Being A Pushover For Being Humble???

Lol! I told you it’s an intriguing topic! Now-what does it mean to be a pushover? The English dictionary defines -Pushover as;

  • Someone who is easily swayed or influenced to change his/her mind or comply.
  • Someone who lets him/herself to be picked or bullied on-without defending or stand up for him/herself.

Now- let’s find out what -Humility means;

  •  This means being humble, egolessness, humbleness in character and behavior.
  • Modesty-being modest, moderate behavior, reserved, pudency.

Okay! Now let’s apply the two in  relationships setting. At times when I observe some relationships in our society, I just shake my head. Most men in our society today both those that are principled and the unprincipled – ask them what they need in a woman. They’d all chime-“a humble woman.” Haha… but the question is, how many actually grasp what it truly means to be humble?

Well- let me paint a picture here of what these two terms stands for, so as to be clear on what my questions are. Assuming,  Mr.Jones has been in a relationship with Kate for about 3yrs and counting… and he, like a drill sergeant  “instructs” Kate on what he wants from her, the relationship and on how uncomplicated he wants things- she goes, “yes bae, I understand.” “She needs to talk- he goes, not now Kate.” She keeps it in, afraid to move even a brick, lest the “sand house” falls apart. They hardly really talk about anything, don’t have the rapport to really know what makes the other partner tick. What truly excite him/her or what secretly pisses him/her off. Instead there’s this unbreakable veil shielding both. Still, they’ve been together for years, no frictions, little or no squabbles, no lovers spats. Haha…how can there be? Since Kate has been reformatted. Here- Mr. Jones tells himself, this is the most uncomplicated relationship I’ve ever had. Kate is “uncomplicated” not demanding, gives me no stress! He goes-she’s humble, exactly what I need!​

This second scenario, let’s say a Mr. Michael and his partner Elizabeth. Theirs has been a little over 8months. And yet Lizzy knows so much about Mike already. They talk, they argue, they’ve sweet memories already and sad ones too. Elizabeth says her mind. She’s herself most times. If she’s offended by Mr. Michael she says so. If she wasn’t comfortable about something that happened – she stands her ground, ask for explanations. She’s respectful actually, reserved, modest but knows when a manipulative card is being played and hate being treated unfairly, if such happens. Now- Mr. Michael goes, aww…she’s awesome, exciting, lots of fun to be with but I wish she’s humble. Lol!

​The thing is- those two scenarios plays out in lots of relationships out there. One begins to wonder, what exactly does the term humble mean to some? I believe if people could answer these questions of mine-which’re;

  1. What does humility mean to you specifically?
  2. Are you sure “humility” is the appropriate trait, you’re searching for or  docility? It could be confusing, just saying… those are my questions.

There would be less disillusionments after”the vows.” Also less embarrassing situations than we read about regularly these days about couples. If our men would put ego aside and ponder on those “humble” questions of mine before making that crucial move.
l think I’ve said enough- you alone know what humility means to you- let’s just hope it still means what it should mean. Do have a wonderful week you all!

Wow!!! Happy New Year!!!

Hello ladies and gentlemen…

This is the new year! Lol! I’m so excited- probably because 2017 is gone! What a whirlwind of a year that was! To discover one is still alive and kicking is exhilarating.

This is 2018. A lot of us have made new year resolutions. Well- it’s all good. It’s all about determination and discipline. Nothing good comes easy. Haha. That’s right! I’m in a high spirit this day. Maybe because I can feel the vibe of this very young year. This year seems to be a year of “free styling” lol! If you know what I mean. If you need joy, celebrations, peace, advancement, a new level, change, next level in life, progress, upliftment- the year seems to be purring this soft words into my ears- ” create it!” YES!!!

Funny enough, I like it. What better way to be what you want to be or achieve your goals than to focus, right from the start and create the atmosphere you desire? This is not the year for excuses! Sorry- that bus has left the station! This new year- let’s face the truth. We all know our weaknesses already. And to become an achiever this year 2018. First and foremost we must admit we’ve these weaknesses- device a way to do away with them, discard them or curb them. To achieve our various goals we must conquer these weaknesses or suppress them. We need to confront our “fears” head on.! Lol! How many heads does it have? It’s all about determination.


Ladies and gentlemen, if one had always failed at a particular venture in the past. This is the time to confront that past and ask the right question, which is-“why”? Let’s find out why we failed in 2017 or in the past. That’s the only way to get the answers we seek in 2018. If you failed in all your previous relationships- this is the perfect time to find out -“why.” What made it so?That’s the only way to make corrections for the future( this new year). Like I said earlier. Only you and I can make 2018 what we envisioned it to be.

The “work” for the future( the year we envisioned) starts now. It’s not about new year resolutions. It’s about visions, goals and the strive to accomplish them all. If you want a happy relationship with your partner this year 2018- then find out your needs. If this present relationship isn’t what you need then you know what to do, if your aim is to accomplish something better this year. But if what you’ve is exactly what you need, then fight for it and create the atmosphere you’ve always dreamt of because, this year 2018- our lives would be what we visualized and created. If you truly want “it.” Go for it!

The thing is-in the year 2018. Don’t expect apples if you planted oranges. Think hard of what you need. If it’s apple juice- then this new year, plant your apples. Don’t plant bitter lemons now and expect apple juice later in the year.

I wish us all- a wondrous and prosperous year ahead! Bon anneé!!!