Avoid Unnecessary Mistakes/Try This- In Your Relationship!!!

Hello ladies and gentlemen…

My today’s topic says;

Avoid Unnecessary Mistakes/ Try This- In Your Relationship!!!

There’s a saying that; “no two marriages are alike.” I believe that could be said for relationships too. As thumbprints are different, so are relationships. People from different orientations, with different personalities, trying to find a balance- a particular person that suits him/her. However, there’re still mistakes that are generally made while in relationships. I believe, learning from others mistakes- could save us from unnecessary headaches/heartaches in the future.

Growing up, I knew this particular couple. They were simply in sync. People loved and admired them. They courted for close to seven years. Then, they got married- the issues started, then, escalated! These two were almost living in each other’s apartment, during those years in courtship, they were quite close. Despite all that, within a year, their marriage, crumbled! It took me years, to appease my curiosity. Lol. For some reasons beyond my comprehension, I kept wondering… their breakup/divorce, gnawed at me. I wanted to know what could’ve caused the discord, within such a short period of time. Later I discovered, a lot of things they tolerated while courting, they couldn’t ingest during the marriage proper. It turned out to be a very costly mistake for both of them. After all those years, they parted as sworn enemies.

Now- these are the few points that I think might help us avoid costly mistakes in our relationships;

  • Ladies, let’s develop ourselves; know your dislikes; your likes; your strengths; your weaknesses; develop self-love;
  • Study your man; pay attention to little things- is he liberal or a conversative? Do you share similar values? Let’s observe these things, before accepting that proposal.
  • Does he want a spirited wife or a docile one?
  • Never have the mindset that you would change him.
  • Don’t  pretend during courtship-e.g. If you don’t like, mountain climbing – don’t pretend you do, just to convince him, you’re the one. In a nutshell, don’t accept whatever you plan not to accept in marriage proper.
  • Be yourself, be open-minded about the relationship.

Gentlemen- all those points listed above are applicable to men too. It’s paramount to know yourself, discover yourself before you uproot someone else from her rooted environment to share your life as your partner.

I discovered that, there are people who never  knew what they wanted out of life- not even their likes or dislikes, nor had any particular convictions, principles before tieing the knot. They just drifted; merging with other people’s identity, living on popular opinions until marriage. If he hadn’t even figured himself out. How’d he expect his partner to unravel all that?  Now- while in the marriage, this side of him, begins to rear its ugly head. Take for instance:-

  • A man that married a spirited lady only to realize, he actually preferred  a docile type- who wouldn’t ‘ve a mind of her own. Who wouldn’t be so opinionated, exerting. How would he not grow to resent the wife?
  • Or one that preferred energetic women; extroverts, lively, ending up with an introvert, only because he hadn’t known his preference at the time he got married. What do you think the outcome would be?

The thing is- mistakes are parts of learning. A life devoid of mistakes may not have adequate experience of what works or not. They’re the necessities of life but then- avioding a costly mistake whenever it’s possible, seems like one’s best bet.

What’s your thought on this post? I’m eager to hear your opinion.

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